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Sunday, October 28, 2007
My post tonight is for all you mom's and dad's out there with a child with Down Syndrome. This post is not to stir up controversy or to start an argument with anyone. I just truly want to know your honest answer.

If there were a pill to take away the extra chromosome so that your child would no longer have down syndrome would you do it?

My answer to my own question is emphatically NO. I would not...and that is the honest truth. I know this question in some ways is not fair because it just could never happen. There is just no way to "cure" down syndrome, no way to take away that extra genetic material in every cell. There are however advances in research by the DSRTF for cognitive enhancements that will be available in our lifetime (which I am not opposed to). But my answer is in response to the extra chromosome....the one that gives my daughter chubby little fingers, a sandal gap toe, slanted eyes, a button nose, brushfield spots in her eyes, her cute little way of saying fwen fwhys and chitken (french fries and chicken)...how could I ever give that up....Days go by and I do get frustrated with her abilities not being par but I love her anyway...I am no where near the best at anything and that is ok, I am happy with my life...and to be successful or to make an impact in life isn't about meeting milestones and IQ markers. We remember people for their accomplishments big and small and we haven't a clue when they walked or talked for the first time.
I would cure society before I ever touched a hair on my daughters head.
The only reason anyone would want to take the Down Syndrome away is because of how harsh society is to our children...so why not, if you have a choice, change everyone else first? I would....I would rather cure the ignorance and hateful attitudes of others. My child is happy with who she is and the down syndrome does not bother her.
I would never give her a magic pill that will never exist anyway.

I know, it is such silly question to ask but just curious who out there would actually cure their child. I know we all want what is best and in no way is your answer to this meaning you love your child any less.


Emily said...

Honestly, if there was a pill that could cure Macy's DS, I would be first in line! But, perhaps that is because she is so little and I am still in the process of adjusting to the diagnosis. I am truly scared for the future and I still feel such a loss for the child I was expecting. It is getting better each day as I fall more in love with my baby but sometimes I feel such intense moments of panic, especially when I read about people with DS being mis-treated by ignorant or hateful members of society. And if I could, I would absolutely "cure" society!

I have read of lots of people who say that they they wouldn't take away their child's DS if they could and right now, I can't relate to that, hopefully in the future I will feel that way to as I get to know and love my baby for who she is, DS and all.

~Melissa~ said...

Nope, I don't think I would want to take the DS away from her. I'd rather there be a pill for people's prejudices against our kids!

Christina said...

I don't thing I would. I would want to change the sweet caring sensitive, AWESOME person that Kallie is! With that said, the reason I might consider it would be because of how just having DS puts society for the most part against her. Schools don't want to include her, employers don't want to hire her, kids aren't lining up to be her friend...things like that have me scratch my chin. So I have to agree with Melissa, maybe a pill to change the prejudice against our children would be easier to make!

rylie's mom said...

Wow-this is not a silly question at all. In the beginning months of my daughters life I would have took that cure in a heartbeat-I even remember googling "cure for down syndrome". But now almost five years later I wouldn't want a cure for many of the same reasons you wrote.I am so thankful that there are cures for all the medical issues that go w/ Ds.

Naomi said...

It's a tough one and I have thought about it. I wouldn't want to take away the essence of who Callum is and part of that comes from that extra chromosome, but I would want to make his life easier. When I see him struggle to learn something that has just clicked for his brother and friends then yes I want a cure, when he snuggles me close and puts his little hand in mine then I wouldn't want to change him.

My sister has a different chromosome disorder with it's own set of characteristics and issues, she's in her mid 30's and if you told her that there was a cure she would be at the front of line.

Deborah said...

I've thought about this too, and I must say I agree with you. The probalem is not our children, it's society.

Leah said...

Unfortunately, I would have to say yes, in my heart I know I'd be giving her that pill. Probably because I'm tired. Angela has an awfully full plate when it comes to medical issues, and I'm tired of watching her struggle. She's tired of getting poked, prodded, studied and talked about. This isn't any kind of a life for a child. Like Christina's daughter, we don't have a constant flow of friends through our door. Angela struggles to be included in the regular ed classroom. She hasn't been invited to a birthday party in over a year. Don't think Angela doesn't know she's missing out. She DOES know! She is fully aware when her peers come to school Monday morning talking about the birthday party they attended over the weekend. She's aware of their conversations of "Can you come over after school?" that don't include her. Yes...if I could get rid of the DS I would.

Megan's got 47 said...

Thank you all so much for your input. I am completely surprised by some responses...not that I do not agree and I am sure we all go through stages in life with our kids where we would and we wouldn't...I wouldn't be surprised when she is older that my feelings will change...as I know my response would have been different during those first few months of life. The only common denominator in all of these responses is HOW MUCH WE ALL LOVE AND CARE for our children.
Thanks you guys :D

Christina said...

OK I just read my reply and I meant to put I would NOT want to change the .....LOL